maybe not...

just when i thought i was finally ready... i guess i'm not.

found out some really distressing stuff about my impending future. really makes me want to rethink everything. like what kind of future am i getting myself into? haha... ok that sounds cryptic, but i shall not elaborate. suffice to say i am mega frustrated and pissed and just feel like giving up. urgh...

ok that might be a slight exagerration. but anyway...

please God, help me to surrender my plans to You and trust that You really know best. that You are in control of this horrible situation. that You will work things out Your way. that i can really place my hope in You.

but i really dun feel like hoping.

but i know i should.

but i dunno lah... tell me what to do!!!

i just want to go to sleep and wake up and it will all have been a bad dream...

yeah right... that won't happen.

bleah